Leap of Faith

As many of you who follow our journey on Facebook already know, we have had a pretty tumultuous couple weeks. Last Sunday, the 8th, our doctor sat Jeff and me down and told us that after a couple days off the ventilator, Logan's lungs had begun to fill up again. He just doesn't have the strength or the ability cough hard enough to protect his airway, so pretty much any fluid in his mouth, nose or throat ends up in his lungs. After much discussion, prayer and deliberation, we came to the conclusion that putting our baby through any more procedures just isn't a good option for us. The doctor told us that we should start preparing for Logan's fight to soon be over.

Last Monday morning we were gathering our family to say goodbyes and making sure our sweet boy felt as loved and secure as possible. Out of nowhere on Monday afternoon, God showed us He wasn't quite through with Logan's journey on this earth. He woke up, acting happier and more playful than he'd been in days, and his oxygen saturation, respiratory rate and heart rate were steadily improving by the minute. None of us really knew what to think... some ups and downs like this are not unusual for a kiddo in Logan's condition. So we resolved to consider any days with him as a gift and to try to take each day, each hour at a time.

Since last Monday, they have been weaning his oxygen as he continues to do well. His lungs are sounding more clear and his cough is stronger each day. He has really made a tremendous turnaround from a week and a half ago. After more discussion and much prayer, we decided this week to take Logan home. We have done pretty much everything there is to do at the hospital, and it's time we try to live as a family of four under one roof again. We are going home on hospice care, so we will have a nurse come to the house periodically to check on our boy and make sure he is comfortable and pain free. We have spent the week getting equipment (hospital bed, oxygen concentrator, feeding pump) and supplies all delivered and set up at home. Discharge is set for this afternoon, and while we are feeling very thankful to be able to be together as a family again, it is hard to leave our amazing team at the hospital. Seriously, our doctors, nurses, RTs and even housekeeper have been so very wonderful to us. It is obvious how much they love our little guy, and I now consider them to be dear friends. I am tearful as I write about how we will miss seeing them every day.

Of course, we have worries and fears about doing this 'alone', because while we know we are far from alone, it will be a big change for us. As we take this step to try to do what's best for our family, we're working on giving these negative thoughts to God and know He will provide for our every need - physical, spiritual and emotional - as He has throughout this whole ordeal.

We are truly blessed in so many ways and are so thankful for the outstanding team of people praying fervently for our family. We love you all.